Michellieee.280310 - Perfect Song

Ahhh, back to the way everything was before catastrophe hit me, but now, back to the way it was, but i think its better than it was before. Things will change, i know that, but i hope the change is for the better, i dont want anything ruining the way everything is, but just to be better, as i wish every nght 11:11 with Michelliebaby.

"I feel the vibrations
When you touch my hands
Like my favorite station
When my favorite band
I get so excited
Sometimes over joy (Oh)
When I'm feeling down
I turn to you for comfort
I can listen to you over and over"

Im happy as my wishes are coming true, and i think its because of her, but one certain wish, is a continues wish, and i hope nothing breaks the chain of this wish. :)
As

"You remind me of my favorite music
Girl you're like my favorite melody
Every word is together
And it's rhythm is where it's supposed to be
Cause you are, you are the perfect song
You are the perfect song

hehehe, just gotta love that song baby. love you awesomabubble cool random baby! :D <3

"You are my inspiration
Like a symphony
You catch my attention
So beautifully
I let you play, oh
So you're always there, oh
I never want your love
To ever go away from me
When I'm feeling down
I turn to you for comfort
I can listen to you over and over"

"You remind me of my favorite music
Girl you are like my favorite melody
Girl every word is together
And it's rhythm is where it's supposed to be
Cause you are, you are the perfect song
You are, you are the perfect song
The perfect song ohh."

--Dopey.Candy--
ps. love you homobaby!

Friday - Awesomeness and Relaxation.

Awesome day today man!, Band practice in my music class was just so awesomabubble! , had loads of fun, and it was just great. My class is gonna own the other class!, cause we just sound so funtesticle!, hehehe. Well what this is really about is cause next week in Year assembly, the music classes are gonna have a battle, and we are gonna perform infront of the year elevens, and so my class wants to pawn their class!

In this, i am playing the drums for the piece. We are playing the song Old time Rock n' Roll! gosh catchy song and yah yah, we gonna own those muhphukas! hehehehe, its not the quantity, but the quality of how we play.

Man the day was so relaxing! bludgey day today, and that really made me happy, as it was the last day of the week and WOOSH! it was a good style to end a awesomoooo week! hehehehe
anywhooo cant be fucked putting it all down hehehe im offs!

--Dopey.Candy--

Monday - Hyponess!

OHMYGOD! monday was so fun, so much to tell, and so many purely highly detailed explaining i would do but i am just not bothered for that.
So so, monday is my Sport day, and and, we had to do volleyball for my sport this time. I was so jumping! like i wouldn't stop jumping all over the place and I kept making everyone laugh. In our second match, i kept failing, and kept giving points for the other team, and i also kept moving off my position on the playing field, and my team kept raging at me!, and i am also captain of my team
My team is called The Warriors! good name for a team
better than the other teams like seriously , one of them is called "highlanders" like who the fuck names a team called "highlanders" its like are they calling em BeeGees" AHAHA

well well and so forth on the game, there was one time, it was going for me, and i was like to my team i got it!, i leaped and jumped for it! i thought i had the ball, in the palm of my hands and hitting it, but instead, one of my team mates, "danny wang" was behind me and tried to go for it, and BAM! i stacked it , fell back and head on the ground, like DANG MUHPHUKA! ouch! but i didn't feel a thing, how strange, ahahah oh wells, funfun hehe.

Then later on the day, it was recess after! like yeah, i went to buy food from the canteen, i bought food, and then went back to the seats with my friends, i sat down, but then the bell went 5 minutes after. then i tried getting up and it felt weird, i'm like why does my ass feel all weird, and when i stand up and i look back, THERE WAS GUM STUCK ON MY ASS!, IT STRETCHED LIKE A MUHPHUKA! :O! like ZZZZZZZ OMGOD! brooo! LOL. but yeahh funfun, i RAGED IT! , but then i dont mind hehehehe. funfun day and so forth and so forth throughout the day.

--Dopey.Candy--

my happiness is back to the way it is.

Ahhhhhhhhhh! im loving my feeling right now, its just the feeling i've been longing to have in so many months, been searching for this for so long, but now.. its finally back, and i'm making sure i can maintain it like this to the best of my awesomo ability .

The Back-Track Year

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh, haven't posted in a while, oh wells, maybe cause too much happening at once that i haven't been able to think properly, and put it all into consideration into my blog, but then again "shit happens". so yah yah.

sooo what does the title mean, i guess its time to back track on everything that i have missed, all the opportunities, and too start hanging out with all my old friends from 3-4 years ago. gosh i've missed those damn fella's! then again, i must balance it with damn year 11, but yahyah, fun fun! :) anywhooo, year 11 is fun fun, lots of things to do this year, and lots of achievements that i must achieve, so lots of things to do,

And i must try keep out of reach in relationships, all that has done has fcked me over, so just hope i don't stumble into another girls arms, for the time being, but then again, who says that can't happen, it can happen anytime so yah yah :) . 

--Dopey.Candy--

i guess the fire is out, but a new chapter begins.

been a few days since the break up with emem, wasn't a really good break up, lots of sad and sorrow words in our conversation. shed the tears i could for her. and she shed the tears she could. but i guess thats how it is. our fire is out, but the light in our hearts won't go out. we shall continue on with our lives. like the normal funny lame people we are. and find our special one.

i know we didn't turn out what we we're hoping to turn out, but i guess, we'll cheer up, we'll laugh at those funny times, and reminisce at our fun times . i know i couldn't do what i needed to do, so i guess maybe thats why this is the result of us. guess i don't want you to cry no more, so cheer up and dry those damp eyes of yours, and i shall do everything i can. and you shall do what you can, to move on, for now, or maybe never .

and when you listen to the song i told you to, the song that reminds me of you , please don't cry but be happy, cause thats all i want you to be, just be happy.

love ya em <3 and please don't forget that. 

I Want To..

I want to.. see emem, i want to.. be next to her, i want to.. hold her, i want to.. put my arms around her, and most of all i want to.. catch her when she falls.

been a while since the both of us last spoken to each other or seen each other. and i dont think i can take it anymore. i just, wanna talk to her, i don't care if i only talk to her for 1 second, i just want to hear her voice or watch how her fingers quickly move across the keyboard of a computer and seeing each word she types. it means everything. it should keep my sense to know that she is alright, and i hope she is having fun.

I guess ill do my best to have fun. i do have another drink up for a good friends birthday tomorrow, and its combined with the new years party. hoping to get fully smashed up! and just simply have a good time with all my friends that shall be there. Its 4 am, i think i should got off now.

--Dopey.Candy--

Missing Her Bigtime.

its been a few days since my baby and i have talked, and im missing her bigtime. the worse thing is, before she left sydney, we had a couple of arguments, which is just gay ><, we shouldn't have had arguments, that time, especially if she was leaving for a few days, i shouldve made her smile more, instead of getting her to leave with those arguments following her.

but i guess she comes back on our first month, we'll miss out on new years togther, but we'll have our first month anniversary to catch up on things, and i hope everything will be left behind, the arguments, the conflict, and just stay happy together, and tell each other stories on what we have done on when we didn't see each other.

Cheer up and dry your damp eyes, tell me when it rains
and i'll blend up that rainbow above you, and shoot it through your veins
cause your heart hs a lack of colour, and we should've known
That we'd grow up sooner or later cause we wasted all our free time alone..

Hope too see you soon baby!
loveloveloveloveyou!<3<3

--Dopey.Candy--

Mistakes & Regrets..

Aiya fella's, well i guess this is the perfect time, 2 am in the morning to
say all my mistakes, regrets and misguidances throughout the whole year of 2009
theres been lots of ups and downs, lots of funfun, and the sad-times, but i guess
it all equals each other up. Too bad this post is about all the bad things thats happened to me and what i've done bad.

Mistakes

-Starting to smoke, too bad i've stopped now.

-Breaking a few hearts.

-Trying to start a few fights.

-Spilling out personal information.

-Taxing, when not needed

-Continuing taxing still.

-Trying to use love as an excuse for everything.

-Putting everything on a person who doesn't deserve any of this.

-Leading some people on.

-Peer Pressuring a few certain people to do bad things.

Regrets

-Drifting away from a couple of good friends.

-Ditching a few friends.

-Stopping Breakdancing for the time being.

-Not keeping promises.

-Making private things public.

-Going crazy at people, who do not deserve it.

-Being stubborn at the most stupidest times.

-Trying to kill a certain person.

-Saying im moving on to a certain person when i haven't technically moved on

-Making A. Le-Huynh Cry.

-Making a few certain people cry.

-Choosing friends over other friends.

& lots more but i just cannot bear to think so bad of myself. due to every single bad thing i have done. i will hate myself more and more to just read this post out of my whole blog. I simply just cannot, take it. But i guess im strong, and i know i can surpass all this.

Due to the problem i have now, i just dont think i can do it. But i shall put it on another post very soon.

--Dopey.Candy--

Every single moment, Tattooed, and Scarred onto my Heart.

Well i guess this year, must be the most memorable and unforgettable out of
all my years. lots of drama, ups and downs but i guess, it drives my life into uncovering
mysteries into truths.

Well shall i begin with the start of the year.
what a beginning. thought i would have an awesome year in cumberland high, but instead
got into a fight with some assface named Peter something something ( dont really fucking care about his last name), i guess i pretty much knocked the kid out cold. ;D just awesome. suspended for 4 weeks, came back, 1 week after, got into another fight but this time, his younger brother. which is a shit talking motherfuckaaaa!. dont really care. they'll get what's coming to them soon. after all that bullshit. thats scarr one, what drama.
oh wells i guess, that was just a blessing.

while on the break. i've been talking to 2 awesome homo girls!, krystal & janet!. 2 cool homos. we would usually talk on the phone every now and then. but there was one time that was so funny. talking about the song "jeremy thurber - i love you but", and then out of no where, janet goes " huh wah, i love your butt?"
ahahah such a crackup, krystal and I couldn't stop laughing at her for like 5-10 minutes. shes the best i guess ;D.

school again.Aiyaaaaaa, new school, Fairvale high!, awesome school, felt very awkward though, awesome moments in this school. didn't really know anyone, well i only knew 3 people i would say.
met the most awesomest friends in here. friends that would stay with ya through out your whole life.
ahhh, awesome reminiscing i guess. i could name them all in tops but i guess ill just say my top 13
i would say are the bestest!.
1.James Cameron.
2.Tram Tran.
3.Danny Wang.
4.Jeremy Weatherby.
5.Jenny Nguy.
6.Christopher Ortiz.
7.Anna Le-Huynh.
8.Grace Guerrero
9.Renny Bolanos
10.Jenny Ly.
11.Cathey Nguyen
12.Justin Le
13.Christopher Leiker
Too many to name but yeah.
continuing on. saw a few people along the way. but there was just one girl that took me. which is Trammy!. good times with her, memorable and unforgettable moments but i guess, time passes on. we shall have each others backs always, and support each other all the way. through thick & thin. hoping nothing changes between the both of us. anywhoo, lets continue.

Drink ups! my god, memorable drink ups! they are just so fun, so many funny things that has happened
in all the drink ups, too many too name, but i guess i can just say they were the best!.

sleep overs!. my god, awesome sleep overs, i remember one at James house, didnt actually even sleep
that night :L, so much fun, just simply bumming around, doing whatever what was good enough
to satisfy our laughter. ahahahhaalol. good times james good times.

the downs and the sadness this year, my god, i felt that i was going to have deja vu like last year.
luckily i didn't, hated my emoness !, that is something i want to forget, to bad its stuck with me forever
i guess, its my own fault, but good experience i guess, good to experience things you haven't been through
so it shows you that you don't want to be in any position that is shit, every again.

but now, i am with my Baby.Emilyn. haven't been together in a while, but we have known each other
for quite sometime now, around 3 years. funfun i guess. we shall stick by through anything
together, and just hope we last. never want to be in a heartbreaking situation ever, well i guess
just not to soon. it will kill me bigtime.

there are more memorable moments but i guess, i shall reminisce about them later, got too much in my mind
at the moment.
and too all my friends
thank you!, thank you for a great year, thank you for everything i guess.
hope our futures will collide with each other in a good way, and we shall all make our futures better. hopefully
because
"LIFE IS ABOUT FALLING, LIVING IS ABOUT GETTING BACK UP"

Love Ya All.
Every single moment i spend with all of you, they are tattooed, and implanted onto my heart. 

--Dopey.Candy--

Silence, Is so loud, yet understanding.

Emem and i are official, well official 5 days ago, on my formal :)
such a memorable moment, and also coincidental.
Well we were official, after the king and queen were announced, and all the couples
joined along to dance. how was it coincidental? well when i asked her, i looked around, and saw
we were in the middle of the dance floor, on the small circle. I was surprised yet so happy.

well what does this title mean? it means, that even though we are silent sometimes when we are
together, it says so much. It means that even though we aint talking for a few seconds, we just
need eye contact to make the words. quite amusing. Yet we understand each other, and what we are
going to say to each other, before we even get the chance to say it.

as i flashed back onto my old songs, which are just all meaningful, and which i have a connection to
for each of em, i stumbled upon this particular song. "Ronan Keating - When You Say Nothing At All"
very meaningful words. as it shows

"The smile on your face, Lets me know
That you need me
There's a truth, In your eyes
Saying you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says
You'll catch me, Whenever I fall
You say it best ,When you say
Nothing at all"

just loving this song forever. <3

--Dopey.Candy--

Defeating this, breaking out, and now where do i go.?

So where do i go now, when year 10 is finished, i won't be seeing a couple of friends, i guess
only focusing on "whats best" for my future. which is pretty much study, STUDY , SSTTUUDDYY!
oh wells, should be "funfun". nah not really i guess, but oh wells, gotta do whats best for now.

besides, i have Emilynn with me, loads funfun, ;D, and i guess formal is coming up in a few hours
thats gonna be a blast, and it should show on how things are going to be in the future, watching
slide shows and more. should show some true colors of everyone, as i can see
thats happening at the end of the year, in school, on how every acts. i pay attention to the
most little-est things that tend to show how everyone.

i guess thats how i am.


--Dopey.Candy--

All over again? as if!, its finished.

Sigh as people tend to keep stepping in, i tend to keep starting All Over Again.
but you know what. its not going to happen over again, taking advice from 2 awesome people
i guess everything they have said to me, has been taken ino place, and now

its start to take some action. further this on? no more, i shall end this. i did say
you we're worth fighting for, but i guess, its time to stop, i will only cause myself more heartache
if i continue, and push away everyone who is trying to escalate all this, and break free from
this chains of depression. well, i already am, too bad im left with my right hand,
left with the right hand, to do the right decision.

i shall simply block off all meaningless things to me, and only focus on what i need
to focus, and do my best with emilynn, i made one huge, major mistake last year, and its tending
to repeat itself at the same time of the year, and with someone i still care for.
i will make things my way, and i will make sure i wont screw any thing else up.

All over again? as if, its finished because i said so!, try continue? you get a punch on the face.
Simple as that miladies and fella's .

--Dopey.Candy--

party through the "day n' night" / mind your own fucken business

wooooo partying through the day and night,my god that was so fun.
it was a get together for my friends and i, seeing as my friend is going
overseas. so chyaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. funfun night, drinking, dancing, bumming around and feeling free.

so the party started at 1, bought so many drinks, too bad we didn't finish them off
and I'm amazed, not that much people didn't wanna do argeeleh that night
oh wells, i guess they weren't in the stage of just smoking argeeleh

but i feel bad for bryan, when he tried to get everyone to listen to him, they we're
all in their own little world, wanting to do what they wanted to do. even though it is his house.
oh wells, shit happens

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

anywhoooooooooo
i ain't naming it but her name starts with a "J". She just had to make things even WORSE FOR ME!
for the fourth time, i was in the bridge of triumph, of getting her out of my head.
too bad someone just had to make things worse, and got me thinking
ALL OVER AGAIN, fucken hell.

oh wells, if she wants to try piss Emilynn and i off, then fucken go ahead, like i care
about you now. go run along now, and do whatever the hell you want, i hope you get
what's coming towards you, i hope its even worse than what i'm in now, and i dont care
if you don't care about me, or what we had,  
I DIDNT ASK FOR YOU TO CARE FOR ME ANYWAYS
so do what ever the hell you want!, just don't involve Emilynn and I in it, cause if you do

that's when it gets personal, that's when i will destroy your life, and no one gets away
with tryna piss me emilynn and i off, or try to diss me in ANY SORT'VE WAY 
GOT-THAT!
If you don't, then may god have mercy on your soul, well actually not even, just hope you find
your own path of despair afterwards.

--Dopey.Candy--

Staying Home, James Is Over :)

So i decided to stay home today, cause i was not bothered going to school
and i've already planned my day so CHYAH! :)
gosh loving my sleeps these days, nice and relaxing, unlike before, i never slept :L
oh wells now i'ved moved on, completely, i can pretty much just look forward to life.

and soooo james came over, and his still here, we just bumming around,
his playing ps3 right now in the nice air conditioned section of the house, while im in the garage, just using
a damn fan! *smirk* blogging :). just gotta love blogging, makes you feel like someone
wants to listen to you. like you don't need to hear what they need to say, they're just there to listen to you.
and its something i can use to say on how i'm feeling, and stuffies,

so right now, its a thursday, and i have late night later on with emilynn. gonna be funfun i guess.
and we gonna be watching new moon! :), i hear its good, i hear its shit, too bad i want to see for
myself how good it is. so time for me to go off this
and probably play some dota :D and probably reminisce but oh wells, its what i do all the time
all good and bad memories :)


--Dopey.Candy--

Time to take a bow, walk away and lose everything.

what does this mean now?, im walking away, from EVERYTHING.
if she's moved on now, but still keep her feelings for me, then why would i even bother
i try and try, and repeat the steps again, but nothing seems to work

i haven't been sleeping cause of this, but now, it is time for me to give up, and lose, because
i know it in my heart, that nothing can fix this, it was her mistake at first
but i took the wrong turn, and made things completely worse, but i guess, i am young, and
its only a mistake, but a mistake i will not want to relive again, and have de ja vu on.

not worth it right now. not worth anything. i'm only hurting myself right now with this, i
have put it on myself, and now, i must do something i never do, which is give up
I FUCKING GIVE UP NOW!

you happy now, i've done something, you have made me done with your lack of caring now.
so i wont bother you now, i wont try to curve your life, i wont try be the redemption i was to you,
i wont try to change you in any way, because i know if i continue
on with this, it will only bring ourselves heart ache, and a lot more. but i will reminisce on all of this.

i know we are still good friends, and that we will support each other through anything. but i guess
its time to just leave it as that, i guess this is how it's meant to be, so i'll stop caring now.


--Dopey.Candy--

5 Questions...

releasing all my emotions by this.. i can't have every single one of them left in me. i cannot allow
myself to go insane about this, i must not hurt anyone with my emotions of this. i must do my best
to stay away from my friends, i must avoid them, i just cannot have them near me, i don't want them
hearing all this, cause they are just gonna be like

"DA FUCK"?, why are you telling me all this stuff, it really just puts people off a good mood.
and better yet, avoid them, from asking me too many questions, I HATE QUESTIONS RIGHT NOW!
i already have too many questions to ask and answer myself! i've already got too many problems with me!
i don't want them to fucking build up and most of all, i don't wanna push any of my friends away.

but in special cases such as this one, i must avoid, i must do what i can by myself, i have to make my
own choice, in my own way, using my own knowledge. i know i am going to do something stupid, but
i will learn, i will learn from my mistake, i just hope this mistake doesn't risk my chances.

so.. as i was talking to Nikki about all this, i stumbled across  5 questions.. 5 questions that are
very relevant to my situation, and i must answer by myself, myself only.
they are

1. Who makes me feel more like its love?
2. Who can't i imagine my life without?
3. What are the consequences and think about them both, whether I take the chance or not?
4. Will i regret it?
5. Will they both be able to be in my life, after this decision?

these questions will continue to ring in my head, until i have answered them all. i hope when all is
said and done, i have the the right decision, and as my friends say
"If Its Not Fine Yet, It Is Not The End"
even though I'm sick of that line, seeing as it was said too many times to me.


--Dopey.Candy--

Can't stop thinking of you..

I.. i just can't stop thinking of you, it's like someone has shot a bullet through the back of my head, and that
it will remain in me forever, and i just yet to wonder..
nothing feels right, each time I'm doing something, every time i go out with a group of friends, there
is always something there i see, that reminds me of us.. of you.

but all this, i was stupid about it, i was too stupid not to realize the signs, the avoiding, not talking to me, and
more so. i should have picked it all up!, and now, the result is this. im ..
JUST SO STUPID

i'm not a guy who likes to show his emotions, i'm not a guy who would show the TRUE self to anyone.
i can pretty much be a mystery, with all these mood swings, all these constant changes. what am i trying to do.
but what i can't change is the fact that i miss you.

I can honestly say you've been on my mind
Since I woke up today..... up today
I look at your photograph all the time

I woke up this morning and played are song
And throwing my tears, I sang along
I picked up the phone and then put it down 

i've made everything else worse, but i'm not going to say how. i would do anything, to
go back to the night we talked, i would do everything in the world, to fix it, seeing you, seeing us
like this, our feeling is unbearable.. just wish time stopped, because that's what would always happen when
your with me, and its only us two.

i guess, what i'm trying to say after all, all these posts, only three words are obvious..
its that
I Miss You...
i just cannot move on, signs keep popping up, that remind me of how we were, how you were.
so im picking up this sign, and not going anywhere. cause i know, there's something special
and unique on our way for us, i don't know what it is, but i know that it will bring us great joy, and happiness..
i hope.



--Dopey.Candy--

Missing her.. do i really wanna move on just yet..

its been a couple of days, been feeling like shit, not a really good thing, been missing her completely. nothing feels the same, school, outings, life, whats happening to me!>< I've never felt like this ever before =[, and i don't think ill be feeling like this for a girl ever again, only her.. i need.. i need someone to help me with this.. i cannot do it alone, i know i can't, my mind! my heart! is going all over the place! my emotions, are unbearable!, i feel like going insane! ARGHH > <
I MISS HER! > <



but recently, I've been seeing someone. she's loads fun, she's awesome, and a lot more to her than you think.
she's actually more than you'll expect her to be. but chyeah, at the moment, my mind and my heart, is just overloading with what's happening, what I'm thinking about right now.
THINTKHINKTHINKTHINKTHINK


its all i can bloody do!, overload my damn mind and heart with it. thinking negative, thinking positive, what else man><. being in this situation is such a killer.. it bloody EATS.YOU.UP little by little every single day. and by the time its finished, you wouldn't know what to do no more, won't even know what "1+1" is, seeing as you've been thinking about this =[. 


i need a sign!, sign sign sign sign sign!, ones that will help me through with this.... i just hope god is up there.. hope he will help me through with this. cause i seriously need help, before i go crazy on this! but for now, i don't really know what i want in life no more but what i do know is, i miss her, and that i don't want to move on yet. 



--dopey.candy--

A need in change - Excitement

a need in change on most things, what does this mean? it means i need something to excite me!
i want so many things to change, but at the moment, the thing that i want to change first, is how
everything is repeated every single day. i need something new every day! or at least once a week.

wouldn't everyone want that. too bad, is that i want it now. i sound very demanding right now,
maybe its cause i need something, something to show on who i am, something besides music. something
besides that people wouldn't expect me to do, but i can do it.

oh wells i guess, i just hope my excitement will hit me soon, but i have been going out more lately, kinda
working, but its pretty much reliving last year, not with the same people, but with new friends.

--dopey.candy--